MIDGES - AT LAST SOMETHING THAT WORKS!!

 

Midges

I have an amazing attraction for midges, I've no idea what it is and I can truly sympathise with anyone who has a similar quality. I've read all the facts, did you know it's only the females that bite and try to bleed you dry? (I'm saying nothing!!). Did you know they don't like it if it's too cold, too sunny, too windy? To be honest I don't give a hoot why they don't like, the main fact is that they are evil little b........s and they DO like me!! On top of that, some people don't seem to get bothered by them, which is almost as annoying as midges themselves.

So what can you do about them? Well there are plenty of creams, sprays and herbal remedies. Jungle Formula is a brand that works but it's "deet" based and if it comes into contact with specs, plastics, nail varnish and other plastic surfaces it will mark or even melt them, there is also a weird feel to it and it whiffs a bit. They used to do wipes that were handy, you could shove a couple in a pocket and have no fear of a bottle bursting or leaking, alas they seem to have stopped producing them now. Bog Myrtle is a herbal remedy that is supposed to help and if you can't find a bog or don't know what Myrtle looks like you can buy bottles of the stuff. Didn't work for me though.

The last few years have seen "Skin So Soft, Soft & Fresh Dry Oil Body Spray" by Avon being touted as a good repellent and it does work for many people. My wife gets away with it most times and if they are not really in the mood for a large feast then it sometimes even works for me. The downside is that they still land on you and then get stuck to you. (Apparently the S.A.S use it but if they are really that hard they shouldn't be scared of wee midges anyway!)

THE ANSWER TO YOUR PRAYERS?!!

I'm not one to recommend stuff but some things should be shouted fron the roof tops and SMIDGE is one of them

I remember one day last year, at dusk, heading out for a walk along the beach at Bernera, there were swarms of midges enjoying the still, damp, warm evening. A few camper van owners sat, locked in their vans peering out and smirking knowingly at us as we set off along the beach. A group of miserable looking campers sat by a smoky fire with midge hoods on and a group of kids ran past us waving in anguish as they were slowly being eaten alive. We walked down to the Ferry slip and back and the midges treated us as if we were ghosts, they just seem to not want to land on you, bliss! It's very hard to describe what it's like being able to walk along without any fear but you DO get this really smug feeling. I don't know if it will work for everyone but if it works for you, you will probably want to pay me for the advice, enjoy!

ps: I don't get commission or backhanders for promoting this stuff, I just believe itís the best thing since sliced bread and the inventor should be nominated for a Nobel Prize!!

THE MIDGE FORCAST

Keep your eys on the Midge Forcast during the season.

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